Of course when I don't blog the Earth is still rotating and my life carries on. There are thousands of things happened, no matter it is good or bad, it is still a "past tense". Bought set of rainbow card from taobao hoping that the spirit that I have had from the psychology workshop could never end.
"There are no problems, only limited viewpoints."
Recently I kept picking up this card, trying to pull me out from frustrating for the problem that I;m facing recently. Actually, I also what my problems are. One thing to share hoping that someone will read this someday when the day really comes.
I don't know what have/had happened in the past few years and I'm still thinking the same that I choose not to know. When the trust is already not there, it is pointless to listen anymore. No matter what or how, he is still the one who I loved deeply and the memories that belong to us will be with me forever. Long time ago, I loved you more than anyone else in the world; now, the feeling kind of like family member, my big brother. Been pampering and taking good care of me in the past yet being treated by me selfishly. For the very last time, let me be selfish again in the end. If there is a time limit for the storage of your memories in somewhere which I don't know where, I hope it is not this century. You deserved to have a better life and I will move on by myself like what I am doing now.
Now I realised the consequences of being pampered. There is no benefits but making me weaker and weaker. Being hurt is ordinary in life but when the hurt is unnecessary then it is a stupid thing for me. No pressure no improvement by Mr Wong. No expectation no disappointment for me in love life. I'm actually quite tired of it. I can be smart in anything but not love. I wonder when I can be mature in love. Sometimes I wonder what love is even try to Google it. After all, I realised Google could not tells it, but the one who is right for us will tell us involuntary and you will know that he is the one. Yet, my sixth sense downgraded to fifth sense when I sensed the wrong thing that I am the right person for him too.
Whenever I'm tired of life, I will always choose to rest. I aware that I should stand up from where I fell. Perhaps just let me have a rest on the ground first, I will stand up by myself without needing anyone for lending a hand anymore. Trying to be tougher that the past when I see this "一个人如果不坚强，软弱给谁看？”
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