Ignore my feelings??

I know there is always separations happen around...But I really sick of it...Why should they left one by one once and once??? I thought our friendship had reached to the stage where it needless to say how sad am I about your leaving....But in the end,you left just like that and until now I don't even receive any notification that you have reached... I forgot,it is not  because of I don't concern but I'm too care about it...Nevertheless,she left......Similar to the way that she left 3 years ago...also similar the way that he left 2 years   ago without any message left,also the way that my grandma left 3years ago without any last word for me except for the disappointed sight towards me when I was about to go back from visiting her...My best friend,my lover,my dearest grandma....one by one......What can I say when everything is a fact now?? There's nothing else i could say except "nevermind".....I appreciate each and every one who love me and I love....However,why do i need to express my appreciation by acting I don't care at the end???

To:The One That Got Away

Hey...Perhaps I am still the same as u scolded me as "white eyes"...Because I wanted to do stupid things here...hehe...During this 2 years,there were so many things happen around me because the Earth did not stop  rotating even one people disappear in this world...Eventually,I 'd finished my SPM...Result was not as good as u expected,I'm sorry because I did not do my best >.< Now is doing form 6,I hope I can be more independent without you beside me,do you think I can?? Of course I will my best =) and I made new friends in my so called new school..well,I never thought of I would study in a girls'school,anyhow its a fact now o.O

Sometimes,someone will ask me:what you want to be in the future? Seriously,I'm not sure what is the reason whether is you left or I'd changed my mind or I did not change my mind....I really don't feel like continue my dream anymore....Nonetheless,I think no one can predict what will happen in the future...I have had the feeling of my life for this 2 years is so blank...just like a piece of white paper....Unlike the past, the 2years are so meaningful and colourful that can described by a piece of drawings coloured with different colours of crayon...It had been so long I never seen you and heard from you....Honestly,I miss you so much even though as a friend....My friend,my lovely and extraordinary one.....I'm having one and only one question which is:"how do you do recently?" Will you answer??

Everything is just a thought? NO!

I used to be a person who insist that everything I think is right. Nonetheless,I found I was wrong recently. I thought I would not fall in love with my ex- boy friend,in the end I loved him so much;I thought I could take the pain of letting him go,but in the end I was suffering;I thought as time passed by,I would reduce the sadness to minimum and forget everything about us,but in the end the memories are still so clear in my mind even though he had left for 2 years. I know I can't be like that throughout my whole life,I aware that I must stay stronger as no one need to depend on others to live,I know that I must insist my decision on forgetting him. Therefore,I've made a decision. I decided not to meet anyone that related to him. I hope anything or anyone that can link to him please stay away from me as possible as you can. I'm here to apologise if my decision hurt anyone but sincerely if u read this please do not come anymore. I really wish I could do it this time. This is the best decision for him,for her,for them and for me =') Don't worry about me anymore,although I can't guarantee that I'm always fine,I'll love myself no matter what =D